Sunday, February 27, 2011


"Get out of this house!"
She shouted one day,
"I'm tired of you sittin'
Around, in the way."

Now I'm not made of granite,
And my feeling were hurt;
Nobody likes to be
Treated like dirt!

So I got in my car,
And I drove into town;
Went nowhere special,
Just wandered around.

For more than an hour,
I continued to roam,
Till I figured it might
Be safe to go home.

The first thing I heard
When I tippy-toed in--
Her melodious voice,

--Square Marbles (1978)

Sunday, February 20, 2011


We're taught to love our neighbor,
Which is really well and good;
All of us could live in peace
If everybody would.

No doubt our home on earth would be
More like the one above
If we could chase away the hate,
And fill the world with love.

There isn't any question,
That's the way it ought to be,
And I have come to realize
It has to start with me!

If I can do my little bit
To give this cause a shove,
My neighbor may reciprocate,
And show a little love.

So I made a resolution:
I would try, no matter what,
And, with firm determination,
I would give it all I've got.

But up to now, my program
Isn't getting any place,
The blonde informed her husband,
And the redhead slapped my face!

--Autumn Acres (1982)

Sunday, February 13, 2011


One way to avoid the dissension and strife
That often crops up in marital life,
Is for the pair to agree on a way
Where one or the other will have final say.

In spite of true love, disagreement will come,
And it might lead up to a crisis for some,
Unless you've agreed beforehand, like us,
Which one will prevail in case of a fuss.

Before any serious squabbles began,
My Lucy and I arrived at a plan:
We decided to take a nickel, and toss
To see which one was to be the boss.

I'm not so sure that I'd recommend
This same identical plan to a friend;
Fifty percent is the chance you will take,
And that's assuming you get a fair shake.

If I had it all to do over again,
We might do it different than we did then;
I never did see that nickel she tossed,
But whichever way it landed, I lost!

--Autumn Acres (1982)

Sunday, February 6, 2011


Editor's note: When Jack fractured his ankle by falling on some ice in our front yard last month, our friends Michele and James delivered a big, and much appreciated, pot of chicken soup. Hey, maybe they're on to something!

When one of her offspring, in Grandmother's day,
Came down with stomach-ache, measles or croup,
The very first thing that Grandma would say,
"Let me fix you a bowl of hot chicken soup!"

Grandma never would take any stock
In drugstore medicine, tonics or pills,
The broth of a big old fat Plymouth Rock
Was a sure cure for anyone's ills.

Nine healthy children, husky and strong,
Grew up under Grandma's benevolent eye;
Her treatment was surely not very far wrong,
As nine examples would all signify.

My Grandpa lived for many a moon,
But took to his bed at age ninety-five;
Grandma stood by his side with a spoon,
And for more than a week kept him alive.

But Grandpa was called by the angels one day,
And went up to sing with that Heavenly group,
And down at the courthouse, the record books say,
"Death caused by drowning in hot chicken soup."

--Autumn Acres (1982)